Why Don't People Try To Say NO To Premarital Sex Any More? It Saves And Will Save The World..... - page 2 Total results: 34 Pages: 1 | 2 [ 2] |
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 ID: 182744 Posts: 1738 | Date: 2007-12-02 02:36 Ephram S.:
I'm not saying he is manipulating the sex issue. I would think a simple solution
for not having sex before marriage but wanting to do it, which can be good for
some people, is to get married and they wouldn't have to worry anymore and they
could finally consummate the relationship. But instead, over 6 yrs and no
changes in the relationship (talk about stagnant)! There could be other
extenuating circumstances. But let's speculate, let's say you live in a very
machismo society where gay people are harassed and virtually excommunicated from
their families (hey, that could be anywhere!), and let's say you are conflicted
with your sexuality. A perfect way to hide from it would be to "date" an
extremely beautiful woman and agree not to have sex--it's a win-win. It is still
manipulation even though the man is not pressuring the woman to do it. But
anyway, hope that explains my logic.
Wow. That is a quite cynical view of the human condition and sexuality. One is
either in the closet or running a game. Whew! No allowance in there for true,
platonic love. What a shame.
Now of course everyone wants sex. The question here is not the desire to have
sex but having the spiritual fortitude to withstand those temptations in favor
of spiritual growth between the couple. (And by spiritual, I am not making a
religious reference. I am talking about inner spirit within the involved
partners.)
You solution: Get married then you don't have to stress yourself holding off for
sex. Oh my gosh! So simple! Why did no one esle think of that before? You should
get a Nobel Prize. Not! Come on. I really hope you are kidding.
Marriage to alleviate sexual tension. Concept pioneered by Britney Spears,
right? Doomed to failure, my man. Doomed to failure.
Henrietta....bless your heart for being so principled and dedicated. I believe
we have chauvinistically overlooked the fact that you too have the same urges as
any other human being and that it is not just your partner abstaining in the
relationship but you as well. Resisting the urges takes real sacrifice and
dedication. It would be a real shame to ruin a courtship of abstinence with a
marriage for less than noble purposes. Have faith that the universe will unfold as it should  |
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| Date: 2007-11-30 15:47 Carib Goodies:
Wow. That is a quite cynical view of the human condition and sexuality. One is
either in the closet or running a game. Whew! No allowance in there for true,
platonic love. What a shame.
...
You solution: Get married then you don't have to stress yourself holding off for
sex. Oh my gosh! So simple! Why did no one esle think of that before? You should
get a Nobel Prize. Not! Come on. I really hope you are kidding.
Marriage to alleviate sexual tension. Concept pioneered by Britney Spears,
right? Doomed to failure, my man. Doomed to failure.
...
Don't look at the world in blacks and whites my friend, it is a concept
pioneered by our "leader" GWB, right? You're far too smart for that, aren't
you!? There are plenty of shades of grey. I never said if it is not "A" then it
has to be "B." I just don't understand why two people would self impose
restrictions to their relationship of more that six years when there are many
solutions for liberation. I just offered one. One doesn't have to get married in
order to throw her legs in the air for Jesus, although many people feel that
way. Now, I don't know what their relationship is like and it is none of my
business, but to spend such a long time together jerking around the bush, so to
speak, doesn't make any sense to me. If two people want to be platonic all their
lives and that makes them happy and complete, great! But no sex before marriage
and no marriage after six years sounds insane! |
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 ID: 218182 Posts: 10 | Date: 2007-12-01 18:34 Caribgoodness u wrote ,"In the early Christian church there was no mandate to
marry before sex. But if you did marry, such arrangement was permanent. Early
Christians were generally not property owners. But as the religion matured and
began to lay claim to land, restrictions on premarital sex became necessary".
I am so impressed with your very mature and objective analysis caribgoodness,and
the wealth of your knowledge too.
Restrictions however have always been there.It is intrinsic in every culture
until the modernization wave began to alter the standards of sexual morality;its
not the brain child of the christian church because even before christ was
born,Joseph had a whole lot of problems with his betrothed, Mary ,for being
pregnant.And they both being people of honour he decided to send her away
quietly.Why 'd that be so if premarital sex wasn't restricted and he was
sleeping with her?
Artemaxx, kudos,If more couples try to restore the integrity of family life like
you are doing, the world would become heaven on earth as nothing nurtures
growing minds like a GOOD HOME!!!
Ephraim did u say my man may be gay and Lucia that he 'd be off once he finds
another person who 'd give him what he is missing?Hardly!!! He's not gay!!And he
'd have zoomed off with the so many girls around in these past 6 years if he so
wished!
Caribgoodness I should thank you over and over again 4 thrashing the gay
issue.;and also for pointing out the other factors that can deter a successful
marriage like lack of financial independence.It's one of the reasons why we are
not yet married. In Nigeria it's unusual for students to work while studying, So
i intend to Finish my course in Medicine and surgery b4 venturing into marriage. |
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ID: 218182 Posts: 10 | Date: 2007-12-01 19:49 Caribgoodness you wrote..''In the early Christian church there was no mandate
to marry before sex. But if you did marry, such arrangement was permanent. Early
Christians were generally not property owners. But as the religion matured and
began to lay claim to land, restrictions on premarital sex became necessary.''
Restrictions on premarital sex is intrinsic in many cultures until
modernization began to alter moral standards.This restrictions were there even
b4 christianity/christ- Joseph felt betrayed by mary's pregnancy yet felt it
honourable to discharge his betrothed secretly.Why 'd that be so if he was
already sleeping with her?Premaritl sex restrictions is not the brainchild of
christianity nor was it an afterthought.No.
EPHRAIM, in 6 yrs and we were school mates 4 God's sake!! I should know if he's
homo- or bisexual or not.LUCIA,if he wanted girls who 'd give him what he was
missing he 'd have zoomed off long ago! Beautiful and willing girls abound on
campus but his principles supervenes!!CARIBGOODNESS i thank u 4 your mature &
objective analyses:You 've trashed all these wonderfully.And you were right,'m
also forestalling marrriage until i gain some measure of financial
independence;In Nigeria, medical students hardly work,so i intend to finish
school 1st.Medical doctors don't earn meagre sums.
ARTEMAXX,if more couples restore the dignity of marriage/family like u,the world
'd be heavenly!Nothing nutures kids like a GOOD HOME!! Lucia withGod all things
are possible.
Now, everyone, how do u feel when u acheive an 'IMPOSSIBLE' feat especially when
people around you are unable?Rarer successses= greater relish!Make no mistake it
was/is tough 4 both of us,sometimes we let go and kiss and cuddle,but our
emotions we always master.Catholicism is edifying, if you are practising .God's
grace i tell you, is sufficient!
Thank you all, your contributions i have also learnt from.You have been
interesting fellows! |
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ID: 182744 Posts: 1738 | Date: 2007-12-01 20:40 Lucia M.:
[Henrietta Okereke: ...]
Good gal! That's what my sunday school teacher emphasized...later on wen i
joined catechism ..our teacher emphasized the same....the Priest never stopped
preaching the same...Chastity chastity my gals..<he would say>
Exodus 20: 14 and Deutronomy 5:18
Yeah..incase u didnt know...it's written more than one place in the Bible...yet
so many of us have not been able to hold on to that!
I don't mean to get on you, Lucia, but your bible quote has been bugging me more
and more each day. You see, Exodus and Deuteronomy as quoted, represent first,
God giving Moses the Christian 10 Commandments and second, Moses giving those
Christian 10 Commandments to his Jewish people. Overlooking the fact that this
was 3000 years before Christ, those two sections speak to adultery, not to
chastity. If your priest was using the 10 commandments to advocate chastity, he
should be defrocked as a fraud. Adultery occurs only when one or more of the
sexual partners is married to, or has been divorced from, someone else.
And no, I didn't know it was written more than one place in the Bible. Can you
do me one small favor, Lucia, and show me where in the Bible it says that sex
between two free individuals of the opposite sex is a sin and is prohibited. I
was a teenager when I first asked that question of a nun. Since then, I have not
found any priest, minister or theologian that can find a passage in the bible
declaring sex a sin. Mind you, many Christian denominations say
it is, but there is no backing for it in the Bible. Have faith that the universe will unfold as it should |
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ID: 182744 Posts: 1738 | Date: 2007-12-01 20:55 Henrietta Okereke:
Restrictions however have always been there.It is intrinsic in every culture
until the modernization wave began to alter the standards of sexual morality;its
not the brain child of the christian church because even before christ was
born,Joseph had a whole lot of problems with his betrothed, Mary ,for being
pregnant.And they both being people of honour he decided to send her away
quietly.Why 'd that be so if premarital sex wasn't restricted and he was
sleeping with her?
The answer is that Mary was descended from the House of David, a royal lineage.
Additionally, it is not a Christian question at all. Bastardization was a
property problem long before biblical times and extended to almost every society
around the world.
And take another careful look at the Bible...Joseph knew he had not lain with
Mary yet she was pregnant. Perhaps the real miracle was that he did not bash her
head in when she told a tale of being impregnated by the Holy Spirit.
To answer your question, though...my reference was to the early
Christian church not requiring marriage. Mary and Joseph were
not Christians. Their society had different, stricter rules,
many of which Jesus came to change. Have faith that the universe will unfold as it should |
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 ID: 183878 Posts: 1174 | Date: 2007-12-01 22:33 Fighting a losing batt;e, Karl. Most Christians are all about the perception
rather than the truth.
Chime in time: Sex is natural and our hormones dictate when we are most fertile
and capable of reproducing healthy young. Beyond that all our ceremonies and
customs are either icing on the cake or impotent restrictions that are generally
ignored (except by a few faithful or fanatic adherents to any of several
dogmas).If I haven't been there, I'm still planning on going!
If I haven't done it, I've still got time to try! |
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ID: 182744 Posts: 1738 | Date: 2007-12-02 02:35 Charles Griffin:
Fighting a losing batt;e, Karl. Most Christians are all about the perception
rather than the truth.
Chime in time: Sex is natural and our hormones dictate when we are most fertile
and capable of reproducing healthy young. Beyond that all our ceremonies and
customs are either icing on the cake or impotent restrictions that are generally
ignored (except by a few faithful or fanatic adherents to any of several
dogmas).
You are so right, Charles.
I believe the battle was first lost at the advent of the first protestant
religion.
Most Protestant religions condemn the Roman Catholic Church despite Christ
tossing out the old law and giving us two commandments to live by. Indeed the
Catholic Church only references those parts of the Old Testament that Jesus used
in his examples to his disciples. Yet most Christian denominations continue to
use Hebrew teachings rather than Christian ones.
A priest once gave me a very salient point to consider. He said "Think of God as
the Law Maker and the devil as a lawyer". God gave us some very simple laws to
follow in Genesis. The devil gave us technical ways to justify bending or
breaking those laws. God gave us additional rules and examples on how to follow
his laws and the Devil continued to find things that supposedly were not covered
under his laws. God sent Christ to once and for all clarify things and to get
rid of those laws of man in the Bible that ran contrary to God's teachings.
Christ gave two laws to wipe out the old laws of man.
Mark 12:28 And one of the scribes came, and having heard them reasoning
together, and perceiving that he had answered them well, asked him, Which is the
first commandment of all?
29 And Jesus answered him, The first of all the commandments is, Hear, O Israel;
The Lord our God is one Lord:
30 And thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy
soul, and with all thy mind, and with all thy strength: this is the first
commandment.
31 And the second is like, namely this, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as
thyself. There is none other commandment greater than these.
32 And the scribe said unto him, Well, Master, thou hast said the truth: for
there is one God; and there is none other but he:
These laws did not wipe out the old laws of God. Christs word in
giving us two commandments to follow mirrored several passages in the
bible:
Deuteronomy 11:13 And it shall come to pass, if ye shall hearken diligently unto
my commandments which I command you this day, to love the LORD your God, and to
serve him with all your heart and with all your soul,
Deuteronomy 13:3 Thou shalt not hearken unto the words of that prophet, or that
dreamer of dreams: for the LORD your God proveth you, to know whether ye love
the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul.
Joshua 22:5 But take diligent heed to do the commandment and the law, which
Moses the servant of the LORD charged you, to love the LORD your God, and to
walk in all his ways, and to keep his commandments, and to cleave unto him, and
to serve him with all your heart and with all your soul.
1 Samuel 12:20 And Samuel said unto the people, Fear not: ye have done all this
wickedness: yet turn not aside from following the LORD, but serve the LORD with
all your heart;
In other teachings Christ said:
1 John 2:7 Brethren, I write no new commandment unto you, but an old commandment
which ye had from the beginning. The old commandment is the word which ye have
heard from the beginning.
1 John 3:23 And this is his commandment, That we should believe on the name of
his Son Jesus Christ, and love one another, as he gave us commandment.
If we all followed those two laws there could be no transgression or sin. Love
God and love your neighbor as you do yourself. Simple, really. Yet we seldom
practice those two laws. In Genesis God gave a simple command: Be fruitful and
multiply.
Genesis 1:27 So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he
him; male and female created he them.
28 And God blessed them, and God said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and
replenish the earth, and subdue it: and have dominion over the fish of the sea,
and over the fowl of the air, and over every living thing that moveth upon the
earth.
Further in Genesis God gave reasoning: 2:24 Therefore shall a man leave his
father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one
flesh.
25 And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.
Yet where fidelity was commanded among man and wife, there was no proscription
against unmarried reproduction.
And yet another thing that irks many a Protestant: The order in which Genesis
talks about the creation of man implies that although Adam and Eve were the
first, they were not the only humans created by God's hand! The story of Adam
comes after the story of the creation of man.
But anyhow, I go now to be stoned as the Bible says because my pants are cotton
and my shirt a wool and polyester blend with different stitches.
Oh, yes...in my garden I have planted lettuce with peppers and tomatoes. Once
again shall I be put to death. Have faith that the universe will unfold as it should |
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| Date: 2007-12-02 21:14 This has been some classic skim reading.
Thanks to everyone. |
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| Date: 2008-01-23 08:32 Because most people like to "TRY BEFORE YOU BUY" 
Just kidding.
Because it is a natural urge & it feels good! If you are sensible & use
protection you don't have to worry about the issue of abortion.
I don't think people abstaining from sex will save the world. It would certainly
reduce the population!! And while I am of the opinion that couples should be
married before having children, marriage is not for everyone.
The greatest gift we are given is FREE WILL to do as we please  |
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ID: 182744 Posts: 1738 | Date: 2008-01-23 10:15 Riely Saville:
Because most people like to "TRY BEFORE YOU BUY"
Just kidding.
Because it is a natural urge & it feels good! If you are sensible & use
protection you don't have to worry about the issue of abortion.
I don't think people abstaining from sex will save the world. It would certainly
reduce the population!! And while I am of the opinion that couples should be
married before having children, marriage is not for everyone.
The greatest gift we are given is FREE WILL to do as we please
Try before you buy? Funny, last night's rerun of Sex and the City used that exact
phrase while the girls were putting peer pressure on one of their ilk after
finding ut the day before her wedding that she had not slept with her fiance.
What a life humans have where tell you that a decision you have made in your own
heart is wrong.
Next time I am in a red light district I will use the "Try before I buy" method
and see what happens. Hmmm...if she enjoys it does she have to pay me? Well,
perhaps not, so squeezing the melons and tasting the cherries will have to do
while the manager's back is turned!
In my opinion, you do not have to worry about abortion no matter what. You do
the crime, you do the time. Would you be happy if your parents had aborted you?
Ah, not that you'd know the difference anyways. Sort of like stomping on a
roach, eh? Put that little fetus out of its misery. Nothing but a darn tumor
anyways that makes you sick and can kill you. Suck 'em all out, right? What's a
few hundred dollars for a slice and dice compared to the cost of diapers et al
and college?
Abstinence doesn't reduce populations. Ask the Catholics. Catholic marriages
accounted for a huge percentage of the baby boomers. Boom boom, baby. Boom boom,
baby!
My understanding of free will is not that you can do as you please. You have
free will to chose right from wrong. And there are consequences to the wrong.
Choose God or choose the devil.
"If it feels good, do it" was the mantra of the lesbians and gays a few years
back. That's a poor life when everything is centered around feeling good rather
than taking responsibility. Have faith that the universe will unfold as it should |
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| Date: 2008-01-23 12:03 Sex is natural and biological - Marriage is a socialized agreement. Whether to
wait or not should really be up to the individuals in question instead of a
religious rule. I say this because you list Catholicism as your faith. Most
deity-based religions will likely have something to say about premarital sex
(usually that it's bad). Many of your accepted beliefs (if you take the time to
reflect on them) have ties to your earlier education from church, secular, and
family teachings. Dig deeper and you will see that secular and family beliefs
also have ties to religion. It's a corruption, but then again I am an Atheist.
If you choose to wait - good for you. If you choose not to wait - good for you.
Base your decisions on what's best for you, your partner, and children that you
might produce. Abortion is not an issue if you make adult decisions to either
wait , use protection, or try other means that will not introduce gametes (egg
and sperm) together. It's all about being a responsible adult and not about sin. |
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 ID: 170792 Posts: 688 | Date: 2008-01-24 01:36 Carib Goodies:
[Lucia M.: ...]
I don't mean to get on you, Lucia, but your bible quote has been bugging me more
and more each day. You see, Exodus and Deuteronomy as quoted, represent first,
God giving Moses the Christian 10 Commandments and second, Moses giving those
Christian 10 Commandments to his Jewish people. Overlooking the fact that this
was 3000 years before Christ, those two sections speak to adultery, not to
chastity. If your priest was using the 10 commandments to advocate chastity, he
should be defrocked as a fraud. Adultery occurs only when one or more of the
sexual partners is married to, or has been divorced from, someone else.
And no, I didn't know it was written more than one place in the Bible. Can you
do me one small favor, Lucia, and show me where in the Bible it says that sex
between two free individuals of the opposite sex is a sin and is prohibited. I
was a teenager when I first asked that question of a nun. Since then, I have not
found any priest, minister or theologian that can find a passage in the bible
declaring sex a sin. Mind you, many Christian denominations say
it is, but there is no backing for it in the Bible.
Ooops I wonder why I never re-visited this topic...I hope it's not too late to
show u the facts Karl. Sexual intercourse between partners who are not married
to each other is called Fornication.
In 1 Cor 6:18..the Bible clearly states "Keep away from
fornication"
In 1 Thess 4:3-4...It also says, "It is God's will that you
grow in holiness: that you abstain from immorality, each of you guarding his own
body in sanctity and honor"
I wonder why ur nun was not able to answer  |
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